What Would Wander Do?
by DidSomeoneSayDipperPines
Summary: Have a question that needs answering? Why don't you ask the friendliest face in outer space?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello peoples! If you've read my other stories, you're probably thinking, "Why the fluffing Smile Dip are you not updating?" First, I have writer's block, and I've been busy fangirling like an idiot. Plus I got the idea for this story, and my brain would not let it go. **

A blonde girl wearing a Dipper Pines hat, green tee, jeans, glasses and sneakers is sitting quietly on a stool in a large room. She taps away at a purple 3DS, which is flashing unusually bright light. In a rather brighter flash, Wander and Sylvia appear in the center of the room, both looking utterly confused.

"Uh . . . Wander?"

"Yes?"

"Do you know where we are?"

"No I do not." Wander smiles, noticing the random girl. "Look a friend!"

The girl smiles back, but doesn't go any closer due to a glare from Sylvia. "Hi! I'm DidSomeoneSayDipperPines, but you can call me Mousemask!"

"What a great nickname!"

"Why exactly are we here?" Sylvia asks.

"Because I used some random spell I made up on my 3DS to bring you here."

"That's not what I asked."

"You're here because people have questions for you!"

"What?"

"Some random people you don't know are going to ask you questions!"

Sylvia frowns, but Wander looks quite happy about this news.

**Okay, so basically send in questions for Wander and Sylvia via PM. I won't except anything violent or sexual, but random is fine. Ask away!**


	2. Chapter 2

Mousemask is still on a stool in the corner, Sylvia is glaring at her, and Wander is tuning his banjo.

Mousemask: Okay, this is the first chapter and-

Sylvia: Wait, chapter?

Mousemask: Episode! *cough cough* It's an episode. Okay, so yah. I've got questions that you two need to answer.

Sylvia: You ain't getting anything out of me, you hear?

Mousemask: . . . Okay . . . let's begin. *checks laptop* Headcheez asked, How old are you two and when did you meet?

Sylvia: What are you, a Watchdog?

Wander: How old am I? By golly, I can't remember!

Mousemask: You . . . can't remember?

Wander: *smiles* What can I say? My brain's filled with so many happy memories that I just don't have room for some things!

Mousemask: So, how did you meet?

Wander: *smile gets bigger* I met Sylvia while visiting the eighth planet just outside the third asteroid belt in the tenth galaxy from the . . .

Mousemask: Okay, we get it. LAUREN asked,

Hey Wander do u know that Lord Hater hates u.  
What was ur favorite place u have visited?  
How old are u?  
Do u like Gravity Falls?  
Do u like Cheese?  
Have u ever seen MLP?  
How do u survive in a bubble in outer space?

Wander: *waves hand* He doesn't hate me, he's just bad at making friends! *smiles* And I can't pick JUST ONE place!

Sylvia: How old are we? Didn't we already go over this?

Mousemask: Geez, don't be such a-

Sylvia: It would be wise not to finish that sentence.

Mousemask: Okay, okay. Do you like Gravity Falls?

Wander: Gravity Falls . . . oh yah, I remember that place! There were these two really nice kids there!

Sylvia: Yah, the one was a complete wimp and the other wouldn't stop hugging Wander.

Mousemask: Do you like cheese?

Wander: It's pretty good, but I like jellyfish pie the best!

Sylvia: I guess . . .

Mousemask: Have you ever seen MLP?

Sylvia: Wat.

Wander: Pinkie Pie is best pony!

Sylvia: Okay . . .

Mousemask: How do you survive in a bubble in outer space?

Wander: Oh, you mean the orbal bubbles!

Sylvia: They're made of a really complicated mixture, but long story short the bubble lets in any air it comes in contact with.

Mousemask: Alright, one more question. FlamingSyrup asked, "WANDER, you're so freaking hilarious, why aren't you a comedian yet?"

Wander: Oh, Syrup! You're making me blush! And being a comedian isn't quite a bad idea!

Sylvia: You just HAD to put that idea in his head, didn't you?

Mousemask: That's it for now! Ask more questions!


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the questions!**

Mousemask: Okay, let's get started. dalek asked, "What are Wander's and Sylvia's home planets? Do they even have any?"

Wander: *smiles* I'm a star nomad, so I go wherever the celestial wind takes me! Or wherever anyone needs help!

Sylvia: Yah, I've got a home planet, your point?

Mousemask: You gonna tell us where it is, or . . .

Sylvia: B(

Mousemask: Okay . . . next one. *glances at laptop* FlamingSyrup asked, "Sylvia, do you prefer mustard or mayo?"

Sylvia: *gets very thoughtful look* I guess I like mustard better, but I have nothing against mayo.

Mousemask: FlamingSyrup also asked, "Wander, if I told you that every time you licked your left foot, you won seven thousand dollars, what would you do?"

Wander: *shrugs* Aw, I don't need money!

Sylvia: I do! *licks her foot*

Mousemask: *holds back laughter* Then she said, "Now, what if I told you that I didn't really mean that?"

Sylvia: *spits on the floor* I'm gonna get her!

Mousemask: You don't know where she lives.

Sylvia: . . . I'll find her eventually.

Mousemask: . . . okayyyyyy . . . next question! The ninja of Nature asked, "Wander my best friends are betraying me, my cat just died right after Halloween and it seams that all my pets die right after a Holiday. What do I do to keep a good attitude? Sometime I feel like punching someone or crawling into a hole and dying. Anyway have you ever watched or been to Ninjago 'cause if do or have been tell Kai I think he's epically cute. And Wander? Have you read the Bible? And you are so cute!"

Wander: Awww . . . sounds like someone needs a hug! *hug* You just need to put a smile on your face and talk to someone who really gets you! Don't punch anyone! That never helps!

Sylvia: Says you . . .

Wander: *doesn't hear* And yes, I have been to Ninjago! I'll tell Kai next time I see him. And, no, can't say I've read it. Thanks!

Mousemask: Okay, last set of questions! SapphireWolfandFallerforlife asked, "Sylvia: Why are you always grumpy? Wander: WHY ARE YOU SO ADORABLE?"

Sylvia: Am not!

Mousemask: You kind of are . . .

Sylvia: I WILL punch you!

Wander: Punching is not the answer!

Mousemask: Just answer the question so I can run!

Wander: I don't know why I'm so adorable! There's nothing wrong with looking good while doing good, is there?

Mousemask: No, no there is not. Alright, we're done for now. *runs from Sylvia*

**I'll update as soon as I get more questions!**


	4. Chapter 4

Mousemask: Thanks for all the questions! Let's get started. Guest asked, "Would either of you dye your hair neon yellow for 100 dollars? And be called Banana split for the rest of the day."

Wander: Could I help people for a hundred dollars? And okay!

Sylvia: Dollars? Maybe I'd dye it for a hundred crystals . . . and why would I be called Banana Split? That's just dumb.

Wander: Sylvia! We are guests here!

Sylvia: B(

Mousemask: CollinAndMario2000 asked, What would you do if you meet Blythe Baxter in my upcoming crossover story, Wander Over Pet Shop?

Wander: I'd be her friend of course!

Sylvia: Not sure. Gotta meet her first.

Mousemask: CutieLemon7 asked, Do you like cheese? If so, what's your favorite kind? Is it better than bacon? Also, what do you think will be the way that everyone interacts with computers in the future?

Sylvia: I don't really have a favorite kind of cheese. And no, it is not better than bacon. And what in star's name is a computer?

Wander: I like all kinds of cheese! And I can't chose between cheese and bacon! About the computers . . . I'm not sure, but everything will probably be in 3D and holograms and stuff!

Mousemask: dalek asked, Is there a portal to your world or something on Earth? 'Cause I really want to go there. Life is just boring and ugh school and tests ugh, If not what can I do so I'm not bored? To Wander, I'm I get mad at someone what should I do?

Sylvia: Unless you've got an orbal transporter, I'm afraid your out of luck.

Wander: Yah, but while your bored you could play outside or talk on the phone or write or draw or make friendship bracelets or color or have a picnic right next to a giant robot battle! And when you're mad at someone, tell them why you're angry. They'll understand.

Mousemask: GravityFallsMD asked, WHAT HAPPENED WHEN U MET THE PINES TWINS?

Sylvia: Oh yah, those weird humans from Earth. Yah, the one took a bunch of notes on zbornaks and the other wanted a ride.

Wander: Dipper was really funny! He was always so jumpy! And Mabel and I are really good friends! She's got a star on one of her sweaters that looks like the star on my hat!

Mousemask: Alright, last questions. dalek asked,

To the author (Mousemask): Will Hater or Peepers ever appear in this story?  
To the author (Mousemask): How many Warriors books have you read? My Warrior name is actually Mossmask, we sound the same. :)  
To Wander and Sylvia: Have you two ever been to Earth?  
To Wander and Sylvia: What did you two dress up as for Halloween? I actually dressed up as you Sylvia, zbornaks are awesome!

Mousemask: Actually, I was just thinking about adding more characters to this! I'll bring them here in the next chapter! And I've read exactly 18 Warriors books and counting. Awesome name!

Sylvia: Yah, we've actually ended up on Earth on a number of occasions.

Wander: Of course we dressed up for Halloween! I was a video game character who could fix anything with a golden hammer!

Sylvia: And I was a werewolf. I like the classic costumes. And you were me? I'm . . . honored, I guess?

Mousemask: Alright, send in some more questions soon!

**You can now send in questions for Lord Hater and Peepers! **


	5. Chapter 5

Mousemask: Okay, I have questions for Hater and Peepers, so here they are! *snaps fingers and Hater and Peepers appear out of nowhere* dalek asked, "Hater: How many planets have you taken over? Also, how did you meet Peepers and the Watchdogs, or have you always known them?"

Hater: Who are you and what do you want?

Mousemask: Just answer the question.

Hater: . . . A lot. And I enslaved those pathetic eyeballs with my awesome power.

Peepers: B(

Mousemask: dalek also asked, "Peepers: Do the Watchdogs all have names, or a number, or something that you call them by? Hater and Peepers: How do you tell the Watchdogs apart from each other? Hater: How many Watchdogs are there?""

Peepers: All the Watchdogs have names. There's Steve, Jason, Carson, you get it. And it's pretty obvious which watchdog is which, I mean, seriously, we all look nothing alike.

Hater: Say's you. And there are exactly . . . um . . . ten Watchdogs?

Peepers: Three hundred.

Hater: I was close!

Mousemask: FlamingSyrup asked, "PEEPERS! CAN I GIVE YOU AN ENOURMUS HUG? AND ALSO, HOW DO YOU EAT WITHOUT A MOUTH? Wander and Sylvia and Hater- If I gave you an octopus, what would you do with it?"

Peepers: No, you cannot-

Mousemask: *snaps fingers and FlamingSyrup appears and hugs Peepers, then disappears in a cloud of purple smoke*

Peepers: That was horrible. And are we supposed to need a mouth to eat or something?

Wander: Be its friend, duh!

Sylvia: . . . Do octopi taste anything like jellyfish?

Hater: I'd use it for target practice. *blinks* Wait, what's an octopus?

Mousemask: dalek asked, "Wander, Hater, Peepers, and Sylvia: What is your favorite kind of music?"

Wander: Banjo music!

Hater: Rock.

Peepers: I donno.

Sylvia: It's more the song than the genre.

Mousemask: Myca asked, "Wander: So, where would you get a hat like that? And why does it only give you what you need? What's up with that? I'd just say I needed a potato, though.

Wander: It's a secret. And I'm not exactly sure why it gives you what you need instead of what you want, but it seems to always pull through and get Syl and me out of trouble! And you need a potato? Here! *gives potato*

Mousemask: fooppoof3 asked, "From me to Wander: Ever been to Death City? It's the coolest place ever, and Lord Death is SSSOOOOO awesome, I think you'd be great friends. *gives you and Sylvia cupcakes* CUPCAKE PARTY!"

Wander: I can't say I have, but I'll try and go soon if I can meet a new friend there! *grabs cupcake and stuffs it in his mouth* Thanks!

Sylvia: *eats cupcake*

Mousemask: Okay, everyone but Sylvia has to leave the room. *snaps fingers and they disappear* Fan asked, "Sylvia, do you like Wander? Now before you start denying it like a million miles per hour like a chipmunk on steroids this is proof that I saw on some of your adventures( don't ask how I seen them.)  
Exhibit A: you hug wander ALOT! Close I might add.  
Exhibit B: You are worried or mad. (By the way no offense but you have anger issues.) when Wanders well being (mental (Box) physical ( lots of occasions) or even if he lives (hat, fugitives, big scary ship.)  
ALOT!  
Exhibit C: You were still hugging when dodging haters bullets after the greatest in the galaxy comp.  
Exhibit D: It looks like you were thought Wander complimented you when you glowed radioactive sewage. (By the way, how did you get that off?) How do like them apples?

Sylvia: *takes deep breath and tries not to punch the wall* Wander and I are close FRIENDS and close FRIENDS hug. I worry about him because he's wanted by an insane immature weirdo and can easily get himself in trouble. And I wasn't happy when he told me that I was glowing. Seriously, that stuff stung. The weird glowing stuff fell off, but then I had to take a three hour bath to get rid of the smell.

Mousemask: *brings back the guys* fooppoof3 also asked, "For Wander: Where do you get your little ditty from? When something triumphant happens. Hater and Peepers: Hater, you still mad at peepers about when you left him in charge. Peepers: Anybody tell you you sound like Spongebob Squarepants?

Wander: I made it up myself!

Hater: *gives Peepers a dirty look* If the other Watchdogs weren't so STUPID, I would have replaced him by now.

Peepers: Oh my glorn, yes! Who is Spongebob anyway? Why do people think I sound like him?

Mousemask: Fan asked, "All: Did any of you have a run in with The Warner Bros. And their Sister Dot before? If so, how were they and what did you think of them. Hater, if you met them do they drive more crazy then Wander does?"

Wander: No, I haven't met them . . . yet!

Hater: Whoever they are, they can't be as annoying as that pest.

Mousemask: MuffinDino asked, "Peepers, I think you are the best character on this show! Wander, you would be a great...what's it called...the guy that listens to people's problems and fixes them!"

Peepers: Wait, character? Show?

Wander: Awww, thanks! I would do anything to help someone fix their problems!

Mousemask: The ninja of Nature asked, "This anyone of you can answer: How do you get a guy to like you? I've tried being nice to him, dropping hints but he still acts like I'm a no one. And this other guy I know he likes me but I don't like him. How do I tell him I don't feel the same way?  
A question for Sylvia. Do you ever have boy problems? I mean boys just frustrate me! My mom says "Ladies don't hit or fight" but I just want to smack them!  
A question for Wander: How do you deal with people saying what you like is weird and the people you crush on is weird? I have crushes on cartoon characters. ( If anyone laughs I will personally throw you into the pit of the great devourer.) Oh and thanks for telling Kai I like him! *gives cookie*  
Question for Peepers: Why are you so cute?! I just want to hug you! But your name makes you sound like a pervert.  
Question for lord hater: You were meet Lord Garmadon, Samukai, the Serpentine, The stone Army and The Over Lord from Ninjago before? Or Pitch Black from Rise of the Guardians? Because they could teach you how to be a good evil villain. Or I could give you evil laugh lessons. I can mimic any evil laugh including the Wicked Witch of the West!

Wander: I'm not sure . . . maybe you should tell him or give him a note! Or a box with a pair of socks in it! And I'm sure the other guy will understand! Just tell him how you feel!

Sylvia: Not really. I never stay in one place for that long, being a traveler and stuff, so I don't run into a lot of guys who are interested in me. If a guy is interested in me I keep my distance. And "Ladies don't hit or fight"? As if.

Wander: I just don't let them get to me and go on being who I am! And I'm sure there's a way to become their friend. Thanks for the cookie!

Peepers: I'm_ not _cute! I already got a hug today, and I don't want another! And what's wrong with my name?

Hater: Never met them. They sound weak. And I'm ALREADY a great evil villain. I already HAVE an evil laugh.

Wander: So do I! *laughs maniacally*

Mousemask: o_o . . . Okay . . . Rich4270 asked, "Hey, Wander, have you met Phineas and Ferb? If not, they are humans on Earth. Also, what do you think was your greatest adventure? And how was your Thanksgiving?"

Wander: Yah, I met them! They were really nice!

Sylvia: We didn't even have to go to Earth; they landed one of their machines on the planet we were visiting.

Wander: I can't pick just one adventure! They're _all_ my favorite! And our Thanksgiving was awesome!

Mousemask: Alright, send in more questions!


End file.
